I have also decided that writing is probably best - though to put these thoughts into the ether is terrifying. The process of documenting my brain waves makes me take responsibility for myself. Dang it - it is much easier just to silently torture myself. Personal responsibility is for the birds.
Saturday I met up with Joey. I shared absolutely way too much. I don't do that normally. A dam burst in my brain. I couldn't help myself. I promptly freaked out in my car - - called my bestie who talked me off the proverbial ledge.
Sunday morning I got up with Lady Riv. I fed her the first bottle of the day and laid in the sunshine on the couch. She flexes her tiny toes when she eats. She makes little vibrating noises in the back of her throat. It is the sweetest music on the planet. I need to spend more of those moments with her. After the long work hours and school on top - she gets shafted.
How do I get to the place where D and R get all of me and not just a piece?
I get three days off this week. There will be epic snuggling. I am nervous about that much time in the house though. Cabin Fever is not my friend. I suppose the kiddos and I will just have to adventure forth.
Having most of the week off is helping my Monday blues tremendously.
I am giving myself permission to feel overwhelmed but pushing through it regardless.
Life doesn't stop - - neither should I.
Enough for now.
PS I am loved
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